Good Timing

I have the craziest timing. A day before Eric goes into ‘a relationship’ I have my mini goodbye eric blog. Crazy. What a perfect time to have closure for myself though. I am very happy with the timing.

I DID have my moments though. I will admit that. There were a few weeks when I was sulky all of the time because I didn’t understand why he stopped texting me everyday and stuff like that. He would always tell me how much he liked spending time with me.

Anyway. I can honestly say that I am okay with it. The only thing that bugs me is that he didn’t just tell me that he didn’t like me like that. (which is really confusing because it seemed like he did). I am emotional but I am not fragile. I can handle the truth. He should have just said so. I didn’t think he was the type to say something nice to avoid telling the truth. These were his words:

“Oh mag :) Why do you get nervous? U shouldn’t be :o its just me, plain old Eric :D”

“Oh pfff because I like you, you dork. You don’t have to like me. I just wish I could act like myself when we hang out.”

“I like you a ton! But as a friend :o I’m not really into the girlfriend thing, sorry :( Maybe in time :) I’d really like you to act like yourself.

Okay commentary. The with time thing is misleading. Here are the two possibilities.

#1. He doesn’t like me as more than a friend and he was trying to be nice instead of telling me the truth. Thanks for watching out for me but I would have rathered that he had been completely honest.

I didn’t think he was the kind of person to mislead someone so much. This leads me to possibility #2


#2. The other possibility was that he did like me but he liked someone else more and he was waiting for some kind of response from her. Red flag from her would have meant that he could fall back on me. He was obviously getting green flags though. And they made it to the finish line.


Unfortunately both possibilities are strikes for me. I wouldn’t want anyone who would lie to me about something and I refuse to be anyone’s rebound. So in a way, an ‘us’ for me and Eric is pretty much gone. I am picky with character when it comes to guys. So if in the future he decided that he wanted a chance with me, he would have to prove himself harder than he did the first time, whether he was leading me on or not.

I would much rather that he did like me but liked the other girl better but I guess I will never know.
There were so many signs. So either I am just stupid or I am just not good enough for him. Booboo haha

Just getting all of this down into concrete words is pretty nice. I have careful judgments of character for everyone in my life. Not that mine is perfect in any way shape or form. But I try. I wish I could get all the things that I thought into words like this. I could fill books and books for just one day. I think later when I have time, I will write down all the reasons why I thought he liked me. Just because I like researching this kind of thing :)