Afraid

I am afraid of a lot of things.

One thing I am afraid of, is losing my faith in God. If I didn't have God, then who and what greater power would I depend on? No one can deny that there is a greater power of some sort beyond what we can imagine. This greater power faces us everyday and yet we ignore it. For example, things that do not end. Numbers do not end. they are infinite. Infinity brings up many questions.

Before earth there was space. How did that space come to be? It didn't just pop up out of nowhere and decide that it would start the universie. Someone or something had to start it. I wonder about this every day.

If we travel at the speed of light, then time slows down for us but we would not notice. This proves that time is very complex. When I get bored in class, I start thinking more and more about it and some of what I think cannot be put into words. Sometimes it scares me and other times it fascinates me.

I am also afraid of not being loved. Which is a really wierd thing because I know there are a lot of people who do love me. I wish I could take everyone's lonliness away so that they would never have to feel it again. When I transfered schools after the third grade, I lef tall of my friends behind. This was the third time that I had moved. I was always lonely. I didn't have any friends. I made one but she stopped hanging out with me after awhile. I would go to the library everyday at break and at lunch because I didn't have anyone to play with. I even remember certain people making fun of me. I hated it. That feeling of lonliness, at least friend wise, was horrible. I evetually made some new friends a few years later but ever since then, I have been afraid of being alone once again.